I'll be honest with you.
The first week of May I struggled, A LOT.
I don't do well with goodbyes.
In fact, my worst fear is losing the people I love.
I'm too sentimental and compassionate and feel too deeply for everything and everyone.
It's how I've always been and it wasn't until recently that I acknowledged and accepted it.
Reality began to set in and I got scared and terrified of the future.
I cried myself to sleep every night and would get upset every time people brought up graduation because time was going by way to fast.
Holt would always tell me to just take it a day at a time and to not worry about the future until it happened..
But the unknown is so terrifying sometimes...
But the unknown is so terrifying sometimes...
And then I found this:
"What if I told you that 10 years from now, your life would be exactly the same? I doubt you'd be happy. So, why are you so afraid of change?"
This hit me good and hard.
It is SO true and exactly what I needed.
This life isn't supposed to be perfectly planned out to the nines like I'd prefer.
It's about adventure and letting things go and just being happy.
Truly happy.
Living out each moment and just having faith to know that it will all work out how it is supposed to be.
That is one thing I adore about Holt.
He is just a positive person who doesn't like to stress about things that you can't change.
He is simple.
Sometimes I'll vent to him for a long time and all he'll say is "Babe, you're fine. It'll all work out. It's all good."
And at first it ticked me off. Because I wanted him to give me like a paragraph answer with depth.
And at first it ticked me off. Because I wanted him to give me like a paragraph answer with depth.
But, now I know those are the words I need to hear.
The simple stuff.
And I've learned and changed so much from his outlook on everything.
So guys?
I'm ready. And I'm finally excited about the future.
About my life.
About allowing my Heavenly Father to take me down which paths I need to go.
I'm excited for adventure.
And I know it won't be easy, but I've made it this far.
And I'm always grateful for my trials and experiences in the end.
So I'm ready.
I'm taking in each moment that I can and loving it so hard.
xoxo
bailey
Growing up and moving on can be scary. It's hard because we don't know exactly how the future will pan out, but it will all be ok! Everything will end up the way it is supposed to be, and you want to know something awesome?! Heavenly Father knows that you are ready and able to handle the trials that He is sending you. He knows that you are ready to grow and become an even more amazing Bailey than you already are. :)
ReplyDeleteKatie
You just have to remember, you are not loosing anyone.Friends come into your life and memories are made,lessons are learned and thanks to facebook they will never be too far away. You are just making room for new friends and adventures.
ReplyDeleteleaving high school was scary for me at first. i had all of your same fears about life post-high school. but life after high school is full of new adventures and new people! in college you gain new friends and expand your horizons. you may not be as close to your group of high school friends, but my friends and i still get together when we are all home and we keep in touch. you find out who you really are when you get out into the world and on your own. i am so excited for you to find this new part of the world!! its a wonderful place:)
ReplyDelete